David Dybdal, MD, PhD - Compassionate, Effective Psychotherapy and Medication Management
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Two Wolves


A quirky old wise man once told me, “follow the scent."
Though I was too naïve to know exactly what he meant.
 
Still, I listened, and grew, more than I ever thought I could,
Just as he had said, and always knew I would.
 
His faith crossed my path again and again,
Across time and space much love did he send.
 
Two wolves,
one love, one fear,
“don’t be afraid to come near,”
they whispered softly in my ear.


COMPLEX PTSD


sometimes I am caught in a groove that runs deep in my brain,violently trembling and drowning in pain,
in that trapped and helpless place into which I am drawn, again and again.

but now aware
of the pain that I often think that comes from out there,

slowly l learn
that it's mostly the feelings in me that make me tumble and turn,

from something that happened a long time ago, 
and what's left broken in me needs tenderness so,

I sand down the edges, an inch at a time, 
what once seemed huge walls that kept me in line,

For a New Beginning

FOR A NEW BEGINNING

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,
Where your thoughts never think to wander,
This beginning has been quietly forming,
Waiting until you were ready to emerge.
For a long time it has watched your desire,
Feeling the emptiness growing inside you,
Noticing how you willed yourself on,
Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety
And the gray promises that sameness whispered,
Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,
Wondered would you always live like this.

Give and Take

Give and Take

So difficult and overwhelming often seems my life,
With all its waves of pain, struggle, and strife.

The vague sense that "something's missing," steadily takes its toll.
And now, I'm sure that something from you can make me whole!

With all this pain I feel, I am in so much need.
And yet my urgent words you barely seem to heed.

But sometimes, over time, I come to see that you feel the same way too,
That we're in a bind and stuck, not knowing what to do.

When I think of me as separate from all,

Heisenberg"s Uncertainty


 
The very act of seeing changes what is seen,
Yet many live in fear, and think this thought obscene...

If nothing's fixed or certain,
then what's the point of all that's gained from so much work and pain?
then all the struggle and strife amounts to nothing but a wasted life.

Still...when heart sees heart,
And mind sees mind,
Clarity brings truth that changes all the time.

And just when we think our fate is sealed,
We may come to see there's no fixed real.

We learn to navigate, create with intuition,

What is a Shaman

A shaman dances with the infinite and gives birth to a story, an image, an interaction that has the potential to playfully change everything with striking efficiency.  They reinfuse a sense of mystery, of magic and creativity; exploring new worlds of possibility, a journey, an adventure that is more real, and certainly more exciting than the reality we think we know.

Evolution

Often, we choose roles and patterns for ourselves which help us to cope with the fearful world around us; over time, as we grow, we begin to notice that these roles and patterns don't work so well. We begin to see and feel the discomfort of what's inside and around us.  Naturally, we try to push away the discomfort, to escape the pain.  If we are able to pay attention, we see that this strategy works only temporarily at best, and ultimately prevents us from learning how to deal with our problems.

FEAR

Fear is simply an uncomfortable or painful feeling about the possibility of some future uncomfortable or painful feeling.

Nothing Day


It feels like a nothing day,
Nothing new, nothing to do,
The same actors, the same movies and the same stupid shows...

The same reality that everyone knows,
The same 3 notes, in the same 3 songs,
The same 5 stories about who's right and who's wrong...

Icebergs enmasse crash into the sea,
While a homeless man holds a sign with an earnest plea.....

Maybe i'm just a little bit sad,
To see people on the road get mad,
To see kids fighting to be next on a swing,
One teen, bossy, controlling, and cruel, like an evil king.

Oh God!

Please, don't ask me why,
Sometimes I know a white bearded man in the sky,

Maybe one, maybe two
One for me, One for you,

Sometimes I know a Divine Great Spirit,
Even if there are those who choose not to hear it (and a few poor souls who actively fear It).

Sometimes I know that it's really all Me,
That there's nowhere to go and nothing to see.

Sometimes I wish I had been born a tree,
In fact, it's quite possible that that was what happened to me.

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Two Wolves
COMPLEX PTSD
For a New Beginning
Give and Take
Heisenberg"s Uncertainty

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